Lackluster Lovers

So, trying to avoid going to a sort-of friend’s wedding, right? Don’t know a single one of their friends, and the groom’s sister is Dan’s ex, one he does NOT get along with. 

We stop at the gas station on the way home, and (what’re the odds?) run into the happy couple. Dan gets out to say hi (they’re more his  friends than mine)…first question out of her mouth? 

"Did you guys get the invite?"

I can see his brain working to come up with an excuse. We chat, kind of circumvent the topic, and then he makes the dumb mistake of saying ‘I just gotta check on the football schedule and I’ll get back with you tomorrow.’ Because we all know he isn’t going to the game that weekend.


Looks like we’re going after all. 

Things I wish I never knew:

  • what hate feels like
  • the emptiness of depression
  • the pain that is unrequited love
  • how to be lonely
  • that sometimes, people just don’t care about me
  • that I am not anyone’s priority
  • history will not be any different for my existence 
  • defeat
  • desperation
  • poverty
  • the hole that losing someone can leave
  • what it feels like to want to hurt someone
  • the gnawing, unanswered questions of survivor’s guilt
  • the tone in someone’s voice when they lie or know they aren’t going to keep a commitment 

Is anyone else’s default music player (the one you get when you post something in audio) not working when you go to play anything outside your dash?

The Wailing Jennys
  1. Artist: The Wailing Jennys
  2. 85 plays

The Parting Glass - The Wailin’ Jennys

For O Captain, My Captain. A sad, elegant, somehow hopeful song for his passing. 

Just because I don’t know what’s going on in your life doesn’t mean you’re not a cunt.

I can’t help but feel so out of the loop with my family lately. Well, the side of my family that I actually like. A few months ago a bunch of them went to Chicago without saying anything. About a month ago they all went to a local Celtic festival without inviting me, even though I live close and loooove Celtic things. Last week most of them went to upstate New York to visit country that flew in from out of the country, and no one said a thing to me about it. Now, one of my cousins is apparently going through something rough, and even family friends know what it’s about, but I don’t. Like…wtf people…am I not part of the group anymore? I have the money now for all of the traveling, and Jake has always been the closest to me….seriously?

Dan, stomping into the living room: I can’t dress myself….can you help me put my belt on? Apparently I keep twisting it somehow…

Me, laughing: Ladies and gentlemen, actual adult Dan….

The Civil Wars (cover)
  1. Artist: The Civil Wars (cover)
  2. 63 plays

"Barton Hollow" — The Civil Wars

Because why not. This one has always been one of my favorites too, especially because it’s so much fun to sing along with.


when McGonagall finds out that Ginny is pregnant, and that the Weasley and Potter bloodlines will converge, she marks on her calender the day the child will turn 11 and that is the day she retires